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Spongebob Squarepants does drugs.
'Spongebob Squarepants does drugs. - 11/25/2007 (https://www.debate.org/debates/Spongebob-Squarepants-does-drugs/1/)' Instigator: sidlee03 (Con) Contender: Harlan (Pro) Round 1 sidlee03: "My brain cells tell me that yes, he and the pink guy sit under that rock (which the pink guy lovingly calls his home) and toke up. Actually, the two probably got a hold of some white pony, which explains why they're, more often than not, insanely hyper. The squid is actually the pothead, due to his frequent stage of mellow-ness. The plankton is on acid, for he constantly tries to steal a secret ingredient to a food that simply doesn't exist: Krabby Patties. Or DO krabby patties exist? Anyway, the point is that despite all this, my heart is shouting at me: "No no! The show is just about a talking sponge! It's harmless." So, I say no...there is no way on earth that Spongebob, Patrick, Mr. Krabs, and Plankton are drugheads. I also wish to admit to the readers of this...series of words...will not make a sophistocated debate topic whatsoever, because I just argued both sides, and every word I type is utter nonsense. This is all more of a...statement. Why did I waste my time with this? I don't know. I suppose the answer is that I love to philosophize. It's fun, and that's what we all need more of...fun and laughter. So hopefully you laughed at all of this...although probably not...and had a bit of fun reading it." Harlan: "Hello, I disagree or...agree...or soemthing...whatever...but I would like to join in on the speculation. Spongebob is indeed a junkee, if you want proof, I randomly typed "spongebob drugs" into a google image search, and look what I found: http://images-cdn01.associatedcontent.com... And there we have it, undisputable proof. He is obviously high most of the time, due to his incescant giggling. Sure, some will say: "it is just a kid's show. He is purposefully full of nonsense for the sake of comedy." These people are OBVIOUSLY part of this conspiracy in which the media encourages kids to do drugs. In fact, when his annoying laugh is played backwards, this is what it says: "smoke marijuana...smoke marijuana...smoke marijuana...smoke marijuana" No wonder I have that strange impulse after my younger siblings watch the show, I am reading, allowing my subconscious mind to pick up these dangerous messages! It is a complicated comspiracy involving Anti-American, nazi, commumist, terrorist, evil, iillegal immigrating, mad scientist, flag-burning, Islamic extremists who hate puppies! In the background of the show, there is always wierd pink or green flowers, just kinda hovering there. No doubt about it...they are definitely high. No doubt about it. And we must ask...are they really underwater...does he really live in a pineapple, or are these two, from the perspective of the constantly intoxicated spongebob. "whoa...look at all them jellyfish...Whoaaa..." Bot what we really must ask: Are you high? You have posted a debate about spongebob, a children's TV show. We really must wonder (don't take that seriously). 8?)" Round 2 sidlee03: "FOR ALL WHO ARE READING THIS: DO NOT ACTUALLY VOTE ON THIS DEBATE. IT'S CLEARLY NOT SERIOUS. Oh but the answer is that we are all on drugs...the whole human race." Harlan: "Sidlee, I thought about it and I figured it out. Mr. Krabs himself is not an addict, but instead, being the capitolist character that he is, is the supplier of the drugs. In what form? Krabby patties. That is right, the krusty Krab's is actually a large black market for drugs gisguised as a burger joint. Wanna know what the secret ingredient is? Cocaine. In fact, we will call them "crack patties" now. That is why the businness is so successfull. Plankton, who became addicted to the stuff is trying to figure out what drug he has become adicted to. Songebob and patrick are probably the ones who eat the stuff the most. Thanks to Mr. Krabs, the whole town is jsut a bunch of drugees. For proof, there was one episode when spongebob learns that squidward had never tried a Krabby patty. Spongebob then continuosly pesters him, trying to get him to try one. Squidward adamantly refuses. Finally giving in, squidward tries the tiniest crumb of the meat. He pretends not to like it, but has in reality become extremely addicted. He has dreams about Krabby patties all night and finally gets out of bed in the middle of the night. He breaks into the Krusty Krabs adn breaks into, and locks himself into the vault full of Krabby patties in the Krusty krabs. Spongebob, coming to work early, arns him through the iron door not to eat too many, but squidward ignores him,...and consequently explodes. He goes to the hospital. The dude in the ambulance says: "ahhh..I remember my first Krabby patty". Personal interpretation: Spongebob finally learns why his nieghbor is such a tense, stressed out person: He had never tried one of Mr. Krab's delicious Crack Patties (or "crackie patties", whichever you prefer). Trying to be helpful, he encourages him to try one. Squidward, giving in to peer pressure, tries one and becomes addicted. If one little crumb can make you so addicted, there is a high cocaine concentration. He breaks and enters, breaking the law, Krusty Krabs and eats all the Krabby patties like the thief and burglar and notorious criminal that he is. He explodes, as he deserves, for it was the will of god to make this horrible drugee, criminal to simultaneously combust. That is very innapropriate. This is not a good message to Kids. I think they should make it more appropriate. Here is my proposal: They are cancelled, but before that, they have one final episode. In this episode, the citizens of bikini bottom burn down the krusty krab, and also burn ptrick, squidward, and spongebob at the stake...Possibly while chanting "HARLAN IS OUR GOD!...HARLAN IS OUR GOD!...HARLAN IS OUR GOD!". This would be a much more appropriate message, it would teach Kids that: -People who do drugs are bad -If they do drugs, they will be burned to death -I, Harlan, am their god. -Harlan" Round 3 sidlee03: "So are you actually saying, in all seriousness, that the show is about drugs? Because the comparisons you mentioned could very easily be coincidences. Yes, almost everyone loves krabby patties but almost everone also loves Big Macs. Are you indeed implying that Big Macs are part of a huge drug scheme? What about french fries? Gummy Bears? When a TV show is about drugs, it's usually a lot more obvious. Take Scooby Doo, for example. -Scooby "Doobie" Doo -The Mystery Machine -Scooby and Shaggy suffer from the munchies As much as I would like to admit it, I highly doubt Spongebob is a show encouraging drugs. That does not go to say, however, that the writers and directors of the show were sober during their studio process. After all, we are all on drugs. Also, do you seriously find pleasure in talking about people burning to death? Might need to see a doctor. -Oh and thank you for joining my conversation. 'Twas fun." Harlan: "*EVRYONE, PLEASE DISREGARD ALL OF MY PREVIOS POSTS ON THIS DEBATE, AS NONE OF THEM REFLECT MY OPINIONS* It was just a joke. The world of spongebob is purely hypothetical. But then, all of the world as I know and see it is just signals received by the brain, which is isolated by the skull. But the hypothetical world of spongebob, for me, solely exists in my mind, and therefore may be warped at my will. I created a farcical situation that, amusingly enough, fit perfectly with the story plot. Did the writers purposely create this? Of course not. The people that know me know that I am a very peaceful parson, though I can have a dark sense of humor. Perhaps you missed the joke. The joke was that that episode I proposed would be extremely inappropriate, much more inappropriate than the real episode to which I described. It was just a joke, geez… PS. Please don't bother voting on this debate, everyone, I was not portraying my real opinion."